Topic: Fett vs. Alucard

Actually, in "Master of Monster", Integra's father says that just a stake in the heart would not be enough, that the rules for their defeat were more complex than that.

Boiling the heart is an obscure way of killing vampires. Fett would launch a missile, or granade or something (as a distraction), run up to Alucard while he is lanching it (before the vampire can release Control Art Restriction), and boil him.

I then use Dragon Twister, or whatever, and you go flying up.

While Fett's running at Alucard, he can just teleport behind him, disappear into the shadows and strike from behind.

You aren't playing good enough.
PLAY BETTER!
*whap!*   
My PLAY BETTER! sticks stretch out towards the ground as I spin through the air, and knock the breath out of you.

Fett's sensors would indicate where Alucard is once reaperead. Fett would then wait untill he got close to him, then boil the heart.

What exactly is PLAY BETTER? I take the hit, and then throw the Demon Windmill Sharukin at you.

He would teleport to a distance, release Control Art Restriction, and eat Fett.

PLAY BETTER! is a term my percussion buddy uses when he whacks people with a sharp, painful brush-stick.
I dodge the Sharukin, though it grazes my cheek, drawing a trail of blood down my cheek.  I lick it up, smiling creepily, and pull out a fourth PB!, and link them up in pairs, creating spiky dual nunchucks.  I move in for the kill...

Fett would simply through a bomb as a distraction again and again, untill Alucard realizes that teleporting is of no use.

I put my swords away, and pull out an inflatable (but it looks real enough to trike you) war-hammer and slam toward your head. Not knowing that it is a fake, you put up both nunchucks, and I throw a lobster at your feat.

Eventually, Fett would run out of bombs. 

The pain is beyond words. After screaming my lungs out like a little baby and sobbing in a fetal position, I pull out my inflatable (but looks real enough to trick you) giant hammer, and hit you square in the chest.

He could use a blaster, anything that would cause a distraction.

I take the hit, sumersalt backwards, and pull out an EE-3 BlasTech blaster-rifle, and fire at you.

=D He would eventually run out of distractions.

I absorb the energy into my hands like Vader, and grab the gun out of your hand with the Force. 
I then summon my pet rancor to finish you off.

Yes, but before he ran out of distractions, Alucard would have realized that Fett has  an unnumerable amount of weapons, so he would try a different stratagy.

But you did not realize that my blaster had a mini-bomb in it. I now call apon my squad of Yautja to kill your Rancor, and they hull the skull away.

And then Chrys jumps in the middle of the fight to laugh at you both because you sound so much like her boyfriend who is constantly playing informal RPGs.  ;)

How dare she mock our sacred combat? 

Alucard only needs one good shot with his Jackal, and Fetts missing a torso.

*gasp* not the skull, the most valuable part!
I pay off a horde of Jawas that begin swarming you and your Yautja.  Unfortunately they are no longer under my control, as they believe Chrys to be their "Dark Queen" and won't listen to me anymore.  :(

Fett could just fly over the bullet, zoom towards Alucard, and boil the heart.

We then begin picking of the Jawas one by one with a pistol.

And the Dark Queen chuckles evilly because her jawas have rabies.  Buahahaha!

Boba cant fly over/dodge/avoid bullets, this isn't the Matrix!

blasted creatures...biting me all over...world going dark...help....

Fett could block one with the light-saber, and before Alucard could shoot again, Fett would fire rapidly. He would keep walking toward the vampire, and then boil the heart.

I pull out my three swords agein, and use 100 pound (or ton, or whatever) cannon on all of you, including those desert punks. I then put my swords away.

Alucard would teleport away, and Fett can't stop bullets with a lightsaber, especially if Alucard uses both his guns. 

Thank the maker, he put the swords away...taking advantage of his temporary vunerability, I throw a basketball at your head.

He could not block the bullet with the light-saber, but he could slice it. If Alucard teleported, Fett would do the distraction thing again.

I take the hit, but I then open fire on you with the Jackal.

he could program the slave 1 to be a distraction, fly behind him and use eveything at least twice on him, just trying to comment.

And I watch from a distance as you three do what you do, slowly walking to the fridge for a frozen chimichanga to warm up...

Finally...

Actually, Fett would probably just use the flame-thrower. Also, I have been meaning to ask you, what does your name mean?

When I see you open the refridgerator door, I yell "NOOO!!!" I have riged it to explode on contact, it was a trap. All of the frozen food then shoots out like bullets. I guess you are part of this fight now :D . Get your giant mallet, chain-saw, and fake rat at the ready.

maltese kentaiba is the name of the bounty hunter in a star wars story me and a friend are writing, he's about seven feet, wings, kind of like a humanoid flying fox.

Leaping out of the way just in time, I attemtp to find something of use in my closest, a katana or kama if i'm lucky, and all that i have is an out dated cookie the size of my head, throwing it it hits and knocks one of you out giving me time to escape in search of lunch

As to the lightsabers, it isn't a matter of Fett slicing or blocking the bullets, rather that he cannot accurately meet a projectile going as fast as the Jackal's bullet, let alone two coming at the same time aimed at different parts of his body.
As for Slave 1...Alucard would teleport aboard the ship, which would give him a safe place to release Control Art Restriction, and tear the ship apart from the inside.

I summon up my legions of the undead, a vast army of rotting corpses that burst out of the ground around you.  They promptly begin slapping you with raw chickens.  There is a slight chance you have contracted salmonella.

Before Alucard even aims the the gun, Fett would blast his. The Slave I would be moving too fast for Alucard to teleport into. I if he tried, he would get  boiled by the engine.

I then tell your army that you are the Grim Reaper, and they attack you because they think you killed them. They now attack you. Since you cannot see around them, I fire the Jackal at you.

Well, if it becomes a matter of who can shoot first...the argument would devolve quickly, seeing as I believe Alucard would be able to fire a round first.   
Depending on the environment of the duel...I would say that Alucard could teleport to some kind of cover, or a signifigant distance away, which would give him the approximately five seconds he needs to release control art restriction, at which point any "distractions" or amount of ordinance Fett and Slave I could pump into him would stop him from tearing Fett's head off.

Well, since I can't dodge a bullet, or block it with my lightsaber I apparently have because of a Tales comic, and because I can't wield the Force, I simply shoot the bullet out of the air because I am a crack shot.  It explodes harmlessly and I then shoot the gun out of your hand.
After a long, passionate speech, I convince my army that I am an angel from heaven, and that their souls will be saved from damnation if they kill draco.

Fett could call Slave I to ram into Alucard/wolf beast thing, cauding Alucard to die, and be reborn. While he is bieng reborn, Fett would run over to him, and boil his heart. Fett would just shoot simply shoot the bullets :) .

Fett had the light-saber in the "Enemy of the Empire" series. You are forgeting that I am a master swordsman. I quickly pull out my sword, and I use 3,000 worlds on the corpses and you.

Do you have any idea how HARD it is to hit a creature who can reform around anything that hits him? 
Alucard would just jump on top of the Slave, burrow inside, and destroy it from within.

I dodge 2,999 of the worlds, yet the last one hits me square in the noggin.  I am temporarily unconcious (Im at a LAN party, no time to talk :)

Trying to shoot Alucard with bullets and probably blaster fire is like trying to nail jelly to the wall... three words: holy water pistol.

But I expect Anderson would turn up and demand that no-one is allowed to kill Alucard but him. ^_-

Slave I would be going to fast for anyone to jump onto.

I stand waiting, with my hands behind my back...

Sure he could jump on it...he would just be a little plastered, that's all.  No problem for Alucard.
As for the holy water pistol...I doubt that would be enough to kill him, and I would say the range on the Jackal is a little bit better than water moving through the air.

It is late at night, yet you still stand there.  I revive myself, yet pretend to be dead.  Slowly, my hand reaches down to my pocket, wrapping my bloodied hands around...a silver dagger.  Grinning evily, I quickly turn and thrust it into your side!  HAAHAA!

yea, water ain't going to be to fast shot out of gun, compared to alucard anyway and speaking of anderson, i just had to do this...
"You hear that Mr. Anderson?... That is the sound of inevitability... It is the sound of your death... Goodbye, Mr. Anderson... "
"My name...is Neo"

No longer in the same country, I silently enter the pyramid, steal the mystical sandwhich of gargerensis then prepare my legions of displaced mountain dwarves in hopes of tunneling my way and popping a nearly fatal blow, and then come the new york cockroaches. you know the kind that instead of scuttling under whatever when you flip the light on...these just lift the fridge up and carry it out of the room.

There is no way anything could jump on a moving star-ship.

You all quickly realize that the 'me' you attacked was another decoy, also riged to explode. By the way, what is a LAN party? I am not social and stuff (sorry for the use of 'stuff' in such a manner, I have not slept in two days).

Yes he could.  :)
In C.A.R. level one, as seen in the last anime episode, he can turn himself into a black stream of dark energy that can fly through the air, and impact the Slave if it tries to make a strafing run.  Wish I could get a picture of it...can't find one online.  :(

Fortunately, my stab severed the red wire and not the blue one, so the explosives did not detonate.  I whistle for my faithful steed, a gigantic red chicken with a saddle and harness, mount up, and begin charging you under the light of the full moon.

lol, nobody at LANs get's sleep either. 
LAN parties are when computer gamers get together, network their computers, and play shooters, strategy games, and whatever all night long, sometimes for days.  Lots of fun, but...you feel pretty dead afterwards without any sleep.

Lets drop the Slave I idea until one of us can get proof that he can or cannot. By 'dark energy,' do you mean like a black-hole, a dark cloud sort of thing, ect. Until I know, I really cannot reaply to that...

I throw a pile of tofu and waffles on the ground, which distracts your chicken. I then call upon my Shinigami to create a maze of walls of skullls of clowns (I really like mazes, and I am actually pretty good at them. There has never found one that I could not solve :D . Oh, and I reeeeeeeeeeeeally hate clowns.). The maze haze 74.86 million passages, 43.76 trap-doors, 44.44 secret-passages, 96.23 dead-ends and 496 random monsters and traps.

Gaaaaw, I can't find a picture of it anywhere. :(
It only happens in the last episode, when Incognito kills Alucard, but he somehow survives, and goes to level one.  Incognito, a vampire possesed by the spirit of the ancient god Set, both turn themselves into living energy and fight in the skies above London; Incognito becomes a lightning-blue serpent, and Alucard becomes a trio of black hellhounds that stretch apart and duel with the snake. 
Really need a picture...but after visiting Wikipedia again, I have remembered something.
While it does not occur in the anime, in the magna (which I have yet to read) Alucard is capable of summoning an army of the thousands of souls he has consumed.  How would Fett respond to that?

Maze of clown skulls...well, this would be a tough situation, if my chicken weren't...A MASTER MAZE SOLVER!
It takes the clever beast about fifteen minutes to escape from the maze.  Sadly, the strain was too much for the critters brain, and he expired quickly.  I am very angry, as we went to school together and used to be best friends.  I scream with rage, and charge you with my bloody hands.

In one comic, I do not remember which one, Fett decimated an army of droids.

I then pull out a fire-hose, and spray it at you.

I remember that one.  And even if it could be assumed that the droids are equal to the armies of the living dead, Fett would also have to concern himself with Alucard trying to kill him in CAR level one.

The first blast of water knocks me off my feet.  I sputter, and try to charge again, yet am leveled again by the powerful hose.
The cycle continues for five straight minutes, by which time the fire truck is completely empty.  I resume my charge, blood dripping from my body where the high-velocity stream burst through my skin and shredded my face apart. 
I have nothing to lose now.  I scream a battle cry, and raise an axe above your head.

Fett could drop a few thermal detanators, and then fly away. He would dodge the Hellhound until the unholy demon became 'normal' (and I do use that term lightly) again, and boil the heart.

I block the axe with my social studies text-book, and then whack you into the middle of my maze with my math text-book.

Boba can't stay in the air forever, much less keep dodging three screaming hellhounds indefinetely. 

Ow...back in the maze. I pull a spoon and start digging.
Three hours later, I charge you again, muddy and and tired after digging my way out of the clown-skull maze.

I managed to pick up a copy of the first volume of hellsing. It compares rather well, not like Inuyasha where every manga fits two episodes exactly including text. Instead of revolving around seras victoria it's on walter and alucard. I don't think they have a colored version however.
Near the end is what hellsing would have been like,  instead of alucard it's about a person with 2 personalities and a gun men. They're more like father alexander the paladin anderson and seras.

Actually, I think those two are members of the Iscariot Organization, same as Paladin Anderson.  They hunt vampires for the Catholics as well, though they don't appear in the anime.

yeah, i know, that's the odd part, besides seras who works with alucard. Anderson has a real thick irish accent, you get lines like ," Nice moon oot, ya freaks." " Seems i underestimated the draculina a wee bit" He's a real nut, he gets an entire page of him laughing over supposedly getting rid of alucard[yea right]. It's the original draft for the story line, those characters turn into escariot basically with a lot of tinkering-german to irish-. It's in the left to right format though, the back becomes the front and such, too bad i don't have a scanner. I'll see if i can find any images from it on google or somethin

When I read the first magna, I thought it was interesting that they took the entire fight between Anderson and Alucard, and split it into two parts when they made the anime.  The "Sword Dancer" fight ends after Alucard get's stabbed, but in the magna the fight keeps on going through to him losing his head, which happened halfway through the anime series, in a subway car.
Wish they would make a sequel anime...alongside Hellsing: The Dawn.  Hopefully, Walter and Alucard won't look like girls on that one.

I did not mean he would be in the air the whole time while dodging. With all of the creatures he has to fight on his hunts, he could dodge some pathetic demon.

I think you made a wrong turn at Albuquerque, because you are now in Kingdom  Come. When I find this out, I get my giant weasle to fly me there.

If ya can dodge a bullet, ya can dodge a ball.
Alucard can shoot in CAR level one (an arm grows out of his mouth and fires his Jackal.), and Boba would be hard pressed to dodge one of those high-caliber, explosive suckers while flying hellhounds try to tear him down to earth where an undead horde would be waiting for him.
Not to mention a sea of blood.  (Somewhere in the magna).

I wait patiently for your arrival, reading the latest edition of "Archie and Friends" that I purchase at the nearby Kingdom Come gas station.  I laugh to myself because Jughead has eaten too many hamburgers again.

He could chop the Hellhounds in two, and he already destroyed the undead army with a few thermal-detanators, remember? This would leave him free to blast the arm, and then throw a bomb in Alucard's mouth. This would cause Alucard to come back as a vamire, and Fett would boil the incideous heart!

While you are distracted with your comic, I pity the foo', and Chuck Norris round-house kick your head.

1.  The Hellhounds would just rematerialize around the wound.
2.  A couple thermal detonators would not destroy an army numbering in the thousands.
3.  Alucard has no reason to return to vampirical form, unless he is toying with his victim.

The pure force of the Chuck Norris roundhouse knocks me back to March 3, where I am once again preparing to throw the Holy Hand Grenade of Anitoch.

hey my reader's theater group got second place with that scene from holy grail, my friend who did the brother with the book of armaments the whole speal about how to use the grenade can still recite it from memory.
Anyway, since you two seem ot be caught up in a stand still, the main reason i haven't posted much in this topic. It just seemed cruel to interupt, i was wondering what would be the secondary character's chances...chip vampires, paladin anderson, walter, seras, integra hellsing, etc.
We kind of went over it, let's change gears before we go back to this. Keep the subject fresh. By any means continue from where you left off.


These were the only good ones i could find in a reasonably fair amount of time.

Yeah, we kind of hit Anderson and Walter already...he thinks Fett would be able to sever Walters wires and shoot him but...it would be difficult to touch a guy who CAN dodge a hail of bullets...albiet Fett can probably aim better than ghouls.
Anderson, though...I think we got to the point where draco claimed Fett would just cut through the bayonet blades and boil Anderson with the flamer, forcing him to teleport away to regenerate...but I'm still skeptical as to how Fett would be able to stop six or seven bayonets from hitting him when they're going fast enough to cut through the barrel of Seras's giant rifle.
Chip vampires...Fett could probably handle them.  They will die if they get enough holes in them...though he might have trouble taking on those 66 soldier-vampires from the second-to-last episode.
Integra, having not seen enough of what she's capable other than an unbreakable resolve and incredibly good accuracy, I would not be able to detirmine how she would fare against Fett.
Seras would be interesting...If Fett gets shot with her gigantic rifle, it would be roughly equivalent to taking a hit from D'harhan.  However, she would need to be a good distance away to use it effectively.  Close combat...if she drank blood beforehand, and goes postal like she did on the ghoul-Hellsing soldiers in the anime, Fett would need to stay far, far away from her.  Wouldn't be able to tell how good her regeneration abilities would be in that situation...she doesn't get shot much in the anime, despite the fact that she has Alucards blood running within her.
Incognito would also be an interesting combatant.  I don't know if he can teleport like Alucard, but he can take enough ordinance to blow off his head, and just smile and grow it back.  And Fett would have to be very worried about taking a hit from his giant chain-gun thingie he can grow out of his arm.

Incognito would definantly be a problem, after all Fett is just a man after all, and even Aucard had trouble with him. I'd say chances there aren't very good no matter how you look at it, still, the original hellsing was like 40 or older when he went after dracula in Brahm Stoker's book.
Seras...scary thought to be honest, when she does go overboard, that's about a 50/50 chance in my opinion depending on what mood she's in. At time's she isn't exactly self sufficient by a long shot, more toward the beginning though. She'd be easier to cath of guard than anyone else though.
Integra has at least alucard in the long run, and she does manage to block anderson's bayonets in the first volume, an excellent shot. Sounds like the only reasonable match out of all of them.
I was just listing out, sorry if it read like i hadn't been paying attention with Walter and Anderson.
But then again, does Fett even know how to kill a vampire? I don't think there's much work in that catagory for bounty hunters. If he didn't...the vampire has a lot better advantage there. Especially the ones capable of regeneration,he'd run out of clips long before the fight was over. I know it's been mentioned.
However, daylight or evening? It does matter if only by small and large margins.

Yeah, Fett would definitely need to utilize some anit-vampire ordinance to have any effect really (other than the flamethrower, as draco argues). 
The environment is also a very important factor...the amount of cover, daylight, etc are all critical elements that can be used to each fighter's advantage.