Topic: I Hate Telemarketers!

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Topic #2772
July 11, 2008 12:04 am #

Grr I just had a telemarketer ring me. Man I hate them - they never get my surname right and I'm never interested in what they're trying to sell me. Dammit an Indian guy was doing a survey, I used the tone of voice that was very clear that I would hit him over the head with something hard if he didn't hurry up and get off the phone... should have let the answering machine take it.

Okay I've had my gripe. Anyone else who hates telemarketers or who know of good lines to get rid of them please make a note here!

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It was like thousands of voices cried out for a sequel and were suddenly silenced...
July 11, 2008 1:20 am #

HAHA. i love telemarketers. especially when I pick up the phone.

July 11, 2008 1:21 am #

Dare I ask what you do to them?

BFFC Moderator
It was like thousands of voices cried out for a sequel and were suddenly silenced...
July 11, 2008 7:08 am (Edited July 11, 2008 07:44 am) #

Yeah I have a good time with them. My favorite is:

Telemarketer "Hello, would you like to sign up for a subscription to TIME magazine?"

Me "Yes!" (hang up)

Est Sularus Oth Mithas
I am a Role Playing Gamer, like my father before me.
July 11, 2008 8:07 am (Edited July 11, 2008 08:10 am) #

http://www.sluggy.com/daily.php?date=031014
http://www.sluggy.com/daily.php?date=031015
http://www.sluggy.com/daily.php?date=031016

take it easy baby take it as it comes
July 11, 2008 10:55 am #

Here's a conversation I remember i had with a telemarketer a while back...

RING

"Hello?"

"Hi my name's Tom and I was calling on behalf of MCI to ask if you'd like to consider switching ov-"

"Is this a sales call?"

"Umm...yes. We were wondering if you'd be interested in switching long distance. We here at MC-"

"This isn't my phone."

"Oh. Well may I speak to the owner of the pho-"

"No."

"Well we'd like to speak with the head of Household in regar-"

"I can't talk now. Can I call you back at your house number?"

PAUSE

"Umm...sir. I can't umm...give you my house number."

"Why not? Don't you like strange people calling your house at all hours of the night?"

"Ummm...no..."

"Neither do we."

CLICK

"Kom'rk tsad droten troch nyn ures adenn, Dha Werda Verda a'den tratu."
[url]http://mercs.firespray.net/forum/index.php?topic=39267.0[/url]
July 11, 2008 1:15 pm (Edited July 11, 2008 01:15 pm) #

ah, Sluggy Freelance.., lol, nice one VM, i've done something similar to that, but i told them i wanted pancakes without butter.

July 11, 2008 1:23 pm #

I can't remember the comedian, but he did this to a telemarketer, it was pure comic genius.

When the guy rang his phone he threw on a southern accent and said he was Investigator so and so and he wanted to know if he knew so and so. 

The guy had the telemarketer back pedaling answering questions to where he was on the night of so and so and on and on with the rapid fire questions.

He said this was a murder investigation and this was the last number found in the guys phone and tried to allude he was a suspect. 

He got the guys personal contact number and said there was going to be a local unit out to see him shortly and to stay on the phone till then.

You could hear the real panic in the telemarketers voice as he got grilled, to funny.

"We do bad things to worse people"
July 11, 2008 1:27 pm #

Ive heard yours VM, dont remember where tho...

Est Sularus Oth Mithas
I am a Role Playing Gamer, like my father before me.
July 11, 2008 1:32 pm #
Viking1 wrote:

I can't remember the comedian, but he did this to a telemarketer, it was pure comic genius.

When the guy rang his phone he threw on a southern accent and said he was Investigator so and so and he wanted to know if he knew so and so. 

The guy had the telemarketer back pedaling answering questions to where he was on the night of so and so and on and on with the rapid fire questions.

He said this was a murder investigation and this was the last number found in the guys phone and tried to allude he was a suspect. 

He got the guys personal contact number and said there was going to be a local unit out to see him shortly and to stay on the phone till then.

You could hear the real panic in the telemarketers voice as he got grilled, to funny.

Is this the droid you're looking for?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI&feature=related

"Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege."
July 11, 2008 2:21 pm #

They also really annoy me, especailly the ones who will not take no for an answer.

Thankfully most of the ones who phone here only want to speak to home owners :D (LOL one of the advantages of renting :D )

Jedi photographer - May the focus be with me.
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July 11, 2008 2:35 pm #

You know those "Do Not Call Me" lists?  You have to update it every 2 years or so... Your signature on it expires.  My mom, who detests teles with a passion, was so pissed when she found that out.  They started calling her again...

Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.~ Fulton J. Sheen
July 11, 2008 2:43 pm #

Yeah I'm on that list too. It really did help how many of those dumb calls we were getting. We still get some... but not half as bad as what it was.

The worse was when i was working and when i was in the middle of making a sign and the phone would ring. It was my responsiblity to run across the shop to get the phone... only for it to be an automated tellemarketer. DROVE ME NUTS!

Meat is murder...... tasty tasty murder.
"Suggestion: Electrocution works well. Evisceration and Decapitation are also effective, or um, so I've heard."
July 11, 2008 3:14 pm #
Gustavo_Perez wrote:

Is this the droid you're looking for?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=J5z4Vs26-TI&feature=related

Ok....that was effing hilarious.

Est Sularus Oth Mithas
I am a Role Playing Gamer, like my father before me.
July 11, 2008 4:57 pm (Edited July 11, 2008 04:59 pm) #
Valthonin wrote:

Ive heard yours VM, dont remember where tho...

some comedian or other...the funny thing is i didnt remember that id gotten it from anywhere until i heard the same joke a while later...sometime recently, in fact...

funny how wierd memories come back at the oddest times...

"Kom'rk tsad droten troch nyn ures adenn, Dha Werda Verda a'den tratu."
[url]http://mercs.firespray.net/forum/index.php?topic=39267.0[/url]
July 11, 2008 6:01 pm #

VM, Jerry Seinfeld did something like than on Seinfeld.

That video's freakin' awesome.

take it easy baby take it as it comes
July 11, 2008 6:07 pm #
draco fett wrote:

VM, Jerry Seinfeld did something like than on Seinfeld.

That video's freakin' awesome.

Thats right! I knew it...it was Seinfeld. yeah that was hilarious. he says something like.

"Well im busy now could you give me your home number and I'll call you there?"

"Um...Im sorry sir I cant."

"Why? You dont like complete strangers calling your house?"

"Yes."

"Neither do I." Hangs up

Est Sularus Oth Mithas
I am a Role Playing Gamer, like my father before me.
July 11, 2008 6:12 pm #

I feel sorry for them sometimes.  When I had to sell ads for my old high school yearbook (yes, I was on the staff *sigh*) it was humiliating to have to launch into a sales speech and have them go "Oh, not interested."

One guy even hung up on me.  :/ 

I'd hate to have to do that for a living.

Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.~ Fulton J. Sheen
July 11, 2008 9:36 pm #

Classic :D

BFFC Moderator
It was like thousands of voices cried out for a sequel and were suddenly silenced...
July 12, 2008 5:07 am #

My house used to get them all the time; my Dad was ready to get some sort of tracing device so he could track them down and make them die a slow painful death  :P

It's worse that we are a totally English speaking family yet have a Spanish last name.  Either we're getting telemarketers calling SPEAKING Spanish, or we're getting some English speaking clown who totally butchers our name...............

My Dad would *and still sometimes* cut off the latter's sale's pitch and say "Call back when you learn to say the name right" or tell the former "Call back when you learn the language"........Click

:P

"You set a code to live by. I won't be wronged, I won't be insulted...I won't be laid a hand on. I don't do these things to other men, and I require the same from them."
July 16, 2008 1:52 pm #

What I have been having a problem with is one right after another at certain hours of the day or equally bad is when the caller is a recording or a computer.

A man's worst enemy can't wish on him what he can think up himself. Yiddish saying
July 16, 2008 2:33 pm #

Oh I hate that, it's like "I'm not good enough for a real person?"

Mind you I just hang up on those :P

BFFC Moderator
It was like thousands of voices cried out for a sequel and were suddenly silenced...
July 16, 2008 3:49 pm #

lol, i engage in conversations with the recording machines. of course they can't respond, which makes me laugh harder.

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