Topic: Bf/Gf

I agree too. It's not just for religion (though that's my main reason), but cause of love. It would be an awful waste to go ahead and do it with someone you're not going to be with forever. Cause then the magic and specialness of it's gone.

Agree when you say till death do us part, you are not only makeing a commitment to each other but to the all mighty as well, oh yah and saveing yourself for your life partner is the smart thing because of STD's, or pregnancy it only takes one time and you can have a life of regreat.

Okay, I have a problem here, does anyone have any suggestions on how to respectfully tell someone "Thanks, but no thanks"?

I can't help you there. The only time I was asked out in RL I laughed at him cause I thought he was joking.....

Ouch.....

you could say, lets just be friends. or you could say, I dont know you well enough.

Just tell them that you are currently un-avalible and that you would keep them in retention if the circumstances should prove favorable at a future time.  Or my other fav. if you really don't care for them just say so in those terms.

Or, if the person does not even know your name, you could just ignore them.

She's in my math class of seven people. We all know each other relatively well. And I don't think someone who doesn't even know my name would pay that much attention to me anyway.

Good idea I suppose, except it's permanently unavailable. As far as I know, I'm neither gay nor straight. Is their a word for that?

Ugh no offense but you might be bi since it's in between gay and straight

I said neither. Bi would be both.
Edit: And if I was, I believe, yes, that I would take that "ugh" as offensive.

then just say you dont like relationships.

Okay, I was just wondering if their was an official word for it.

Yes, asexual.

Okay, thanks :)

Going back to my old point, I honestly don't think that relationships are all they have been cracked up to be. I don't see the use of them.  I am probably the only avid anti-relationship person out there, and I was wondering if that is stupid, or just plain, well, insane.  I know most people don't share my views, but what is so great about a relationship?????

Well if you're the girl in the relationship you get a lot of free meals and movies. If you're the guy you get to get rid of all that green-stuff that's clogging up your wallet. Win-Win I guess.

depending on your point of view.

I know some relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be unless you are truly happy with the other person.  There is nothing wrong with not being attached to someone in particular.  Humans are typically social creatures, but there is no law saying we have to have a spouse/partner, whoever.  Some people are very much happy to be by themselves.  I'm sure I would be if I could.

(As to another topic, yes I think the term is asexual)--Sol--I got a kick out of your sig, too!  I just saw Happy Feet, and now I'm picturing that...lol

Wow, had many girlfriends in my past.  Was married at 19 for about two years.  We had a baby and everything went sorta downhill shortly after.  She was extremely manipulative.  Wouldn't let me see my family and stuff.  Not cool.  I'm glad I'm out of that relationship.

I've had about two girlfriends after that.  But in my line of work, you don't really get to have the opportunity to be with someone.  Just not enough time.

And what is your line of work

Civilian contractor for the Norwegian military.

Oh

um, Where do you live???

I currently reside in Norway. Although I am half American.  My father was American while my Mother was Norwegian.  Dual citizenship.

oo, so are you going to move to the USA?

Don't come back, then you become one of the evil many who live in the decadent West.  (or at least wait until GWB is out of the White House.)

No matter how antisocial you are, you will need someone at some point in time. Trust me. I might very well be the least social person on the planet (to the point of garnering shrink attention), but I realized the aforementioned point and got to making myself more talkative. It's important. Besides, having a boyfriend/girlfriend is mad fun.

absolutely. In my opinion having a bf or gf isnt a bad or good thing. a relationship just like everything else is measured differently by the quality and the people involved. im in one and i enjoy it very much. but if i wasnt then i would be happy being single as well.

If you were just referring to regular friends I'd agree with you, but as this is the Bf/Gf thread I will assume that you're not, and if that is the case I need to correct you(And it's not necessarily a matter of anti-socialness): Don't assume you know everyones' mind. There are those of us who will never feel the need for a relationship of that kind, ever. Trust me.

Yeah, it's a pretty funny quote :) Not sure where Darknovae got it though.

Well, considering I was born and raised in the U.S, I may already be one of those "the evil many who live in the decadent West."

Not all Americans support Bush.  I was, however one that did. (Keyword, was.)

I know I've been off of the forums for a long time now....mostly due to the rigors of college life and an ensuing addiction to F.E.A.R. (online shooter).  I'd be suprised if many of you remember me too well, since I see a lot of new faces since I've been gone...
And I'm only here to, more or less, put the last nail in the coffin of my absence from the BFFC...it's been fun, but I've gone and found me a girlfriend now.  And I can't stop talking to her, I love her like crazy.  ^_^ So it's adios for now...only appropriate to post this in the bf/gf thread anyways, since she's the reason I may never see any of you again. :P

I'll be back in the summer though....

That's too bad. Goodbye for now.

How could we forget you? you are a hard person to for get :P Glad to hear that you got a GF, good luck to you.

Peace

Chris

I could go either way on the BF/GF issue. On the one hand I was in a relationship for four years that was parasitic and abusive. It was sandbags off the balloon when that was over. On the other hand, I met this man online whom I am really compatible with (after long last) and could be very happy with. It is finding the right somebody and working at it that is the challenge.

As for me, never been on a date, never had a boyrfriend, and only ever had a crush once, and that was when I was 12.  No regrets pal, no regrets.  I'm not actually allowed to date till I'm 16 (bout a year to go on that), but even if it was allowed, I wouldn't.  Highschool freshmen are waaaaaaaaay, to young to be dating.

As for what us girls like, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE, DANCE.  Most boys just seem to have an issue with actually asking us to though.  Come on ya'll, get some guts!

As for how I feel, I haven't really liked anyone that way, and if I have, I squashed it.  Lets just wait till we get a chance to know them first, be friends, and learn more about them that way.  Crushes just make everything messy.  You can't even hardly talk to whoever-it-is, just cuz your too embarassed to hardly say a word.  So I got over it. End of story.  And not heartbreak, no misery, no guilt, and no regret.   Yay for not-obsessing-over-getting-a-boyfriend-just-cuz-it-seems-like-everyone-has-one-even-though-most-people-don't.

And BTW, I completely agree with you, 11 is waaaaaaaaaaaaay to young to have a boyfriend.

Pheonix023 out.

Pheonix023,
Its alot harder to ask a girl out than you think.
But I do agree with you, be a friend first. Thats what I did. She was my best friend for 3-4 months before I asked  her out.  But that relationship is since gone. School was to stressful for a Girlfriend.  She is still a close friend though :D

-BD

Chivalry vs Feminism. Some guys are afraid to ask girls to dance, but why can't a girl ask the guy? All I hear nowadays is "girls should have equal oppertunities" "Women can do everything men can" "Men are chauvanist pigs" (Not as popular but heard)

And yet those same women expect the man to automatically pay for the meal. To hold the door for them. (I know I'm sorta blowin it out of proportion, but it's true.) I just think that women should either accept equality everywhere.

And this isn't based on everyone, because I do know some girls who go dutch. I also know my friend's g/f accepts everything he needs because he does the same for her.

It depends, I suppose.  Nothing on Earth (Or anywhere else) can shake me on this one.  And many have tried.  To me, a girlfriend is far too much trouble to go through.  It's just not for me, sorry.  I respect the other opinions here, and if that's what you guys want, fine by me :).  I just don't see myself as that kind of person.

I remember when my Ex GF asked me to a dance. I thought it was pretty cool.
But strangly, when I broke up with her......She went to ARC.....Talk about strang....

BD

18 pages of this. Wow thats alot of people. ;)

By the same token, girls have the same issues asking guys. I always pick the one that's not even remotely interested in me, which is why I've stopped trying for now.
I have no problems paying for my own food and have been known to argue when someone wants to pay for mine.
I dunno... even as recent as four months ago, I felt very lonely, like there was something terribly wrong with me since I've never had a BF. Now I'm back to not caring, and it's good. I don't think one's life should be defined by someone else.

Very true SD_Chick.  We are our own persons.  However, we are also human beings which is naturally a social being.  So it's only natural to feel lonely at times.  But what makes you feel good in the end is what's important for your well being.

  I haven't had a girlfriend now for a long time.  At times I feel pretty lonely, not having someone I can sit and talk with, or cuddle up on the sofa and watch a movie with.  But hey, this is the course that I chose, and when it comes down to it, I'm pretty happy.

  Sometimes, having a mate isn't really what it's made up to be.  It can be a pain, and it can be very hurtful.  I remember when I was younger, I didn't understand why people had girlfriends.  I thought to myself "They are only going to break up again, there never getting married so why not wait?"  I suppose I thought that your only bringing pain to yourself every time you hook up with someone and breaking up with them a short time later.  I never understood really.

  And I remember my first girlfriend, Kathryn.  Cute girl.  Very sweet.  But I remember in a little love note I had gotten, it said "I can't wait for all the fun times we will have this year."  It sorta hit me, that she had no intention of being with me for longer then a year.  I found that a waste of time and broke it off.  If you are going to put a time limit on such matters, then what is the use?

  And every time I get with a girl, it usually ends up with heartbreak on my side.  I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I suppose I "fall in love" too fast, too soon. 

  But oh well, some things aren't meant for some people.

dont you think she said that, because Next year, she might not plan that far ahead. Nice post though.

I agree.
I don't really give a crap anymore.  Way to much time wasted.  I have better things to do.

BD

I agree. If it won't last, if there's no future in it, then what's the point of getting attached to someone?

Thanks.  But you'd have to have read the note yourself to fully understand what she meant.  She did mean it as just a year thing.  I had even asked her about it and she said "Well, isn't that how long they last?"  But I suppose we both were too immature.

Like I said, some things aren't meant for some people!

You just have to find what makes _you_ happy.

We're naturally social beings?!? Wow, this is news to me!
(if you ever meet me in person you will realize there are exceptions :D  )

what would you guys (or girls) say is an appropriate age to start dating? what is the age where someone can have a  meaningful and long lasting relationship? and why...

You can't really put an age on it because each person matures at his or her own rate.  But there are some requirements in my mind.  You got to be able to drive.  It would kind of seem lame to have your parents drive you everywhere with your girlfriend.  And you have to be in a position where you are capable of supporting you gf/ bf as well as youself.  Having a girlfriend or boyfriend is expensive, trust me I have friends who are proof, one has a nice ZO6 that he recently put new headers on, and he doesn't have a girlfriend.  And his brother has a little 4 cylinder Honda that almost no money has been put into, and he has a girlfriend.

Back to the age question it really depends on the person (and of course the parents).  If you have been allowed to date it all depends on you.  And if you've moved out of your house, ignore what I just said.

It seems immaturity is an "in" thing now, as odd as that sounds. I know lots of college age people that act like they're 14 or younger- never show up for class, always whine and cry about this or that, go through BFs/GFs like Kleenax, that sort of thing.
I say the longer you hold off on dating, the better. Previously I thought 16 was a good age for dating, but now I look back and think 18 is almost too young. With the stress of college I'm leaning more towards not starting serious stuff until I get out of school.
I think the longer you hold off on dating, the better. It gives you time to figure out who YOU are, before you lose yourself in someone else.